Because I’m tired, but I need to write. February 17, 2011 I
returned to work after I took a leave of absence for my emergency brain
surgery. I wasn’t quite doing a full 8-hour day and the driving in
LA traffic was precarious since my neck
still didn’t have a full range of motion. Dad stayed behind and acted as
chauffer for a couple more weeks and slowly, I was able to have full driving
and work independence. Even today, on days where I’m working 11 hours, I’m
thankful that I can since I remember those early rough days.
February 17, 2013 I had another runners’ high while I ran the
Pasadena Rock n’ Roll
Half Marathon (my 8
th half). Despite being under-trained
(although I think those hill repeats in the foothills of Mt. Lee did me some
good psychologically), I was only 3 minutes off my PR. This race felt less achy
than last year’s Pasadena half marathon and certainly less achy than the half I
did 6 months post surgery.
And after these runners’ highs, I am shaken to the core with
my own humanity and reminder that healing is a non-linear process. I had a
follow-up
MRI in
San Diego. I was so exhausted I fell asleep in the machine and didn’t even
feel the poisonous contrast enter my body. By eight o’clock that night I had
all I could do to sit up through dinner, and my 8:30 I was in bed.
I felt ill. A night of cold-sweats and
discomfort.
My parents didn’t
disturb me for breakfast the next morning.
They kindly brought back some toast & got me some orange
juice. One sip of the juice and my body rejected it. I felt like I was a
dishrag being run out for every inch of its worth.
I slept until we could check out, followed by more sleep
during the 3 hour drive from San Diego to Los Angeles and still more sleep when
we got back home. It took almost a day and a half for the radiation poisoning
to work its way through my system. My previous MRI (in September) also didn’t
leave my stomach in a very happy state, but this one just wiped me out.
Plausible theories surrounding this are the accumulation of the contrast that has
been pumped into me since December 2010, or the fact I’m nearly 10 pounds
skinnier than I was then… which makes it great for running and clothes looking
better, but not so great when it comes to enduring MRI contrast. My doctor
didn’t make a mention of my next
MRI, so I have some time to recover. I’m not
ready to run 3 miles, but I’ll be back on the running path soon. The only thing
my doctor said of note was having the two of us work together to raise money
for brain tumor research. It looks like I have my work cut out for me- I have
my next race to train for & a small (multi-million dollar) fundraising
goal. Should be an interesting year.
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